The Misteries of Life

You can't see me...

2010-06-23T14:07:00.000Z

Pensas que me conheces, mas não me vês. Sabes quem sou, mas nunca me ouviste com ouvidos de ouvir. Julgas que me aconselhas mas na verdade estás a menosprezar o EU que pede ajuda. Falas por palavras que outros outrora usaram, desprovidas de um contexto que é o meu coração.

Não vês o meu mundo nem o que vejo e sinto da vida. São conceitos desconhecidos para ti porque racionalizas o que é para ser sentido. Como queres que cresça quando não compreendes a criança em mim?... Ou em ti?

Ouve uma altura que me entreguei a ti. Escolhi-te para entregar-me. Mostrar-te quem era, o meu EU. A dor, a alegria, a frustração e sim, também o amor de quem se chama Luis Nascimento. Apenas um ser microscópico, insignificante no todo deste universo mas um universo em si mesmo naquilo que sente.

Não me viste.

Projectaste o meu amanhã que será o meu ontem, mas nunca o meu hoje que é onde vivo.

Não me viste.
Porque não te vês a ti.
Não te vês porque não queres sentir.
Pensas.
Alguém que sinta por ti aquilo que não queres reconhecer que tu és.
Alguém que escreva aquilo que não admites sentir.
Alguém. Alguém. Alguém...

Eu sei quem sou e o que sinto. Eu estou bem.

Escrevo-te esta carta na esperança que passes a compreender-me melhor.
Escrevo esta carta a dizer-te... por agora,
Adeus.

Total Loss Of Control

2010-06-19T04:38:00.000Z

When the feeling starts
Red and Yellow are there
One keeps me calm
The other keeps me sane
Feeling subsides
Keeps me in check
Reels me into
A fake existence
I'm controlled

When life hits me in the face
The Dark swallows me whole
Time has no meaning
Life and Death combined
I'm controlled

I'm a puppet of Fate
Deprived of purpose or feel
Empty and alone
My life outta my hands
I'm controlled

ENOUGH!

Now Red and Yellow are gone
And the Dark is no more
Feelings swim through me
An ocean of emotion
Lives in me
Total loss of control

First time Alive...

Sem Titulo

2010-04-08T01:13:00.000Z

Quero perder-me dentro dos teus olhos
Quero sentir-me a sentir-te a ti
Quero mergulhar nos teus labios
E viver na tua boca
No teu corpo
Fazer parte do teu ser
Apaixonante, selvagem,
Livre!

Quero adormecer no teu colo
E morrer nos teus bracos!

All the little things...

2010-03-22T04:05:00.003Z

There are no explications for what we do, or what we feel
One day we're here, the next we're not
One day we matter, the next we're irrelevant.
It's only human.

Them and You

2010-03-22T01:53:00.001Z

They come into your life.
They seduce you with their soft words
Their tender eyes, loving smiles.
They come with offers of friendship
Fun days and nights
A chance to improve on your mundane daily routine.
You welcome them.
They talk of their pasts, their problems
Misfortunes and mistakes,
Dreams and desires,
Troubles and worrys.
You listen to them. And you dont judge
They say "it's good to talk to you",
"It's good to know you"...

You are now hipnotized, mesmerised
Enchanted at every word uttered by their sweet mouths.
You feel you can rely on them, trust them
You become vulnerable, yet safe
You open yourself to them.
You expose yourself, you put yourself in their hands
You suppose that there are no restrictions,
No hold backs, they wont judge you...

You suppose wrong!

For they do not feel as you do
They do not understand you
Your caring and understanding,
Your sincerity and honesty are alien to them
It frightens them, repels them
SCARES THEM!

They start to back away...

The days and nights become fewer and fewer
The intervals between them...longer and longer
You cannot understand their behaviour
"Was it something i said?", "something id done?"
And then it hits you, like it did many times before...

They didnt care about you,
They never did.
They just wanted someone to talk to
To listen
But never to ask "why?"
To confront their beliefs, their actions
Not because you are accusing them
Or even trying to hurt them
But because you want to know them
Really know them
Because you care
Because you feel for them
(Even though it's not reciprocate and you always knew)
And still, you want to help them.

But it's too late

They never realised that you already made your choice
Of knowing the ugliness of the world
The narrow-mindness and hipocrisy
The fake smiles and laughs
And fight it, with sincerity
Kindness and respect
And love, above all love.

You are now, again where you started
Alone.
But still sure of who you are
It's too late for them...

But not for you.
Never for you!

Random Thoughts

2010-03-13T17:34:00.001Z

And then it was gone. No more hurt, no more pain... For he had rested and was now himself again...

He looked into the mirror not really knowing who that person was, yet feeling a sense of familiarity...

He began to realise that he was a creature of moods, all he needed was a few hours of sleep to change his frame of mind...

He was at a crossroads. A place very familiar to him, but never welcomed. As he stood there he understood, perhaps for the very first time, that he needed those obstacles if he was to become what he wanted... a man!

He gets burned, because he knows no other way. He gets burned...because he likes it! Only, he truly doesn't...

The day will come, when what you are, will no longer be enough...

Today he felt bliss, for he had pushed himself beyond his limitations, only to find out that what was waiting for him, was much more interesting. He welcomes the challenge.

He's so connected to the world, that sometimes he forgets himself...